He gave me to the light,
A soldier, as nameless as I,
With a heart, cold and bitter, still ready to fight.
On this frigid night,
My breath caught in a sigh.
He gave me to the light.
As we dueled, I felt the bite,
And gave a pain filled cry,
With a heart, cold and bitter, still ready to fight.
My chest constricts so tight,
And with his own buried lie,
He gave me into the light.
Nothing compares to my country's might,
She breaks the shield over my heart and takes me so high,
With a heart, cold and bitter, still ready to fight.
As it shines in my sight,
I know I am ready to die.
He gave me to the light,
With a heart, cold and b
I idolized you, a man so cliché,
And missed the threat of that one sight,
Yet you betrayed her and went astray.
Those memories I must not convey,
Have yet to abandon my sight,
I idolized you, a man so cliché.
Your infidelity drove me away,
Of which I am sure you are not contrite.
Yet you betrayed her and went astray.
The life you live is in disarray,
Though your problems you incite.
I idolized you, a man so cliché.
Of things black and white, nothing here is grey,
And I expect you assumed your love would make it right,
Yet you betrayed her and went astray.
She is troubled by our relationship of clay,
And the insipid formalities
Cinders broken to blasted fields
Of righteous thoughts
Arrows flying
Marred flesh bound
In the ground of the ageless days
Always alone
Scared to the core of your being
Lost on the field
That no one saw
All in warmth
Cheering your every move
You never knew
Never saw
Your actions passed through
All the while selling
Sacred memories to demons
In grasses and corpses
So you fight
Cinders broken to blasted fields
Of righteous thoughts
They're by my side
Along for the ride
They have no idea what's in store
It's so much more
It's not just a dream
We're not a team
Just go away
Please don't stay
I need no one
I must always run
Always outmatched
Forever detached
Within my heart
Answer yet to start
Crimson on the blade
I'm stone as I fade
Useless to those I love
Pushed out of the world with a shove
Always thought I'd be here?
Never knowing, of my fear
Do I dare try?
What would happen if I die?
They'd get over it
Screw this shit!
Life's too confusing
Sure as hell, not amusing
Don't know what to do
I just want something new
A world not our own
Where light has not shone
A time when ancients are dead
The prophecies left unsaid
I am trapped in their war
I can't find the door
I am lost again
Gone again
Living in a new dimension
Trying out a new prevention
Nothing new
No way to pull through
No way to see
No one's looking for me
Don't know I'm gone
Feel like a pawn
I am here
Yet not so near
No one said it was fun
It's been awhile since I've seen the sun
I have no one to talk to
What can anyone do?
Surrounded by my kin
Something under my skin
Mind a mess
Could care less
What will occur?
No one will stir
I am trapped
No new routes to be mapped
No one hears my screams
No one it seems
No one could I find
Trapped inside my own mind
Cannot feel
Can't be real
Can't dream
I've ripped the seam
Am I free?
Am I still me?
Was I ever?
Maybe not, no, never!
Forged from lust
Given full trust
Why do I hide?
Don't they see the other side?
I am hate
I am my own fate
I am anger
I am always in danger
Forged from lust
Is life a must?
Why don't they turn on me?
Am I the key?
I am fear
Am I so dear?
I am sadness
I am overtaken by madness
And yet, forged from lust
Lost again
Don't know where to begin
Left without a friend
These wounds won't mend
A dark void in my soul
I can't continue this role
Why am I still here?
I have so many fears
God, why do I care?
Would I even dare?
Let's try this again
Don't know where to begin
I'll never win
These wounds won't mend
Hoping for it all to end
I've escaped this prison
A new feeling has risen
Why am I so confused?
No one's amused
I'm trying to go on
Still not enough brawn
I turn around
Not due to any sound
Walking on
Long after dawn
Walk through the door
Home one more
So you though I was indestructible?
That your punching bag would last?
I had a hole you never saw
Ripped out my heart…
Made me believe I had friends
Sheltered me from the truth
I should have died when I planned
No one knew
No one cared
It was there….
You looked away
Failed to see again
Just stopped caring
Just stopped realizing
I have feelings too
My mind is broken because of you
Why am I even talking?
No one will listen
No one heard my silent cries
Maybe if you listened
I told you
Do you remember?
Bet you don't
Used it against me
Only two showed they cared
He seemed to be true
I think it was pity
Something I'm used
I want to start off by saying that I haven't given up on my poetry, photography, painting, etc. Those are still important to me, however, I am currently, and for some time now, writing a series of novels. I have multiple open projects that I am bouncing between (Yay, ADD). If you are interested, I am under the pen name A.J. Casteux (follow me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/AJCasteux). I have a link to my blog on my Twitter. See the real updates there. I ask that you refer to me as AJ, and not by my previous aliases or real name.
As for more updates on new beginnings, I am looking forward to a move in the hopefully not too distant future to
Salve,
I haven't been on and updated in quite awhile. There has been a lot going on but that's still no excuse. I am now starting a new line of art that is called Corcodar [core-co-dar]. Within Corcodar there will be three main categories: Sorael [soar-a-el] or photography, Fionael [fee-on-a-el] or poetry, and Lirulinael [leer-oo-lin-a-el] or paintings. I figure I will be releasing several series under these headings. Hopefully this won't just be a "let's see if this actually works" kind of thing.
I now have a pod cast that is updating very, very randomly. I advise you to check it out. While you are there, go to Pessimist Pixel. It's one of
Well, I now have prints. I still have to buy my upgrade. That'll be here soon, I hope. I've tried to make as much as I can available at this time. Bear with me.
As for my blogs... yeah. I haven't been in the greatest of moods and things have been very hectic and scary around my house. I won't get into bitching just yet, I think.
I've fallen in love with Criss Angel's music... again. I've also rekindled my love of Highlander: The Series. Adrian Paul fucking rocks. He is two years younger than my mom and I still want to marry the man. He was my first crush (OK, celebrity crush, not real crush). It would be a perfect union.
I recently took in